Let me get this straight – You think I am amazing and awesome and you are so attracted to my strength and tenacity. You’ve always dreamed of having a woman like me in your life, how much better life would be with a woman that can match your drive and strength and determination. You are drawn in by my confidence and self-assurance and you love that I know how to speak my mind and stand up for myself. You think we are a match made in heaven and you keep saying “mark my words, you will be my wife one day”.
You want me to let you be a man; let you be in charge, let
you lead. If I would just learn to relinquish control and have faith in you
(the MAN) I will see that together we will be amazing. If I would just let you
show me then I would see that I can appreciate being taken care of by a man
that knows how to treat me right.
You want me to realize that you are different from every man
that didn’t cut it in my life before. You are different because you want me so
bad and you love me so much and you will give me the world. You are different
because you are successful and assertive, you have accomplished things and
acquired position and clout in the world.
You say I should trust you and you will show me that you
know what I need.
Are you effing kidding me right now?!? Are you for real,
effing serious right now?!?
Are you really that dense?
You are right to value me and see me as extraordinary, I am.
You are right that with me by your side you would achieve more and be more than
you ever could on your own, I am a force to be reckoned with. I am capable of
great things, I have done and will continue to do great things. My self-image
is based in reality, I know my worth and I know what makes me beautiful –
inside and out; and you bet I know how sexy that is. I can speak my mind and
articulate exactly what I mean to say; and because I have all the tact and
grace that God endowed upon my gender, I can do it without having to diminish
or demean anyone in the process, I am that good.
So first, let me tell you that my strength and determination
are as much part of my nature as they are born of necessity. If I put a damper
on my strength and determination to let you shine because your greatness is not
bright enough on its own to be noticed beside mine, I would be less of all
those things you say you admire so much about me.
Second, in all this perceived understanding you think you
have of me and who/what I am. Has it escaped your attention that; in reality, I
do not have any issues about control? Nope, no issues at all about being in
control and not about relinquishing control, zero issues. I have no issues
because I KNOW that if I give up or share control and my partner fails, I
WITHOUT A DOUBT can clean up the mess and fix everything on my own and by
myself. Control issues are not my issues, those honey, are your issues.
You are so different, so unique? You are going to treat me
right, something you perceive that I have never experienced. You are special,
and powerful and can give me everything I’ve ever dreamed of right?
Guess what; I am special and unique, I am powerful and
accomplished. I have achieved worth, recognition and clout in the world on my
own. I can give myself the world. I can buy my own damn Louis Vuitton purse!
You want to get my attention? You have to bring something to
the table that I can’t put there on my own. I can do almost everything I need
to do, by my damn self.
What can’t I do? I can’t wrap myself up in strong comforting
arms at the end of a long day.
You want to be something special? How about being the one
that knows me so well that you can see the signs that the weight on my
shoulders is getting heavy and help me carry it before it breaks me.
You want to be something for me I can’t be for myself? Be
the safety net that is there in case, God forbid, my body or my mind snap under
all the pressure I put on them in my attempts to conquer the world.
You want to give me something amazing that makes a
difference in my life? Give me a reason to smile, make me laugh everyday so
that all that weight is lifted and floats off, leaving me fresh and ready to do
it all again tomorrow.
You want to love me, like I’ve never been loved before? Then
prepare yourself to try to love me more than I love myself. To love me enough
to make sure that I never change who I am, that I never dim my light for
anything and that I always know just how amazing I really am.
You want me to have faith in you, let you be the man; then
be a man, be THE MAN that I NEED.
Show me that you are worthy of my attention.
Show me that you are worthy of standing BY MY SIDE. Show me that you know how
to lead by admitting when you don’t know the way and being willing to follow
someone who does.
Only by learning that the things I need, are intangible
things that only come from your heart and soul, will you be in any position to
offer me anything.
You think you got what it takes? Bring it! I’d love nothing
more than for you to show up ready, able and willing.
Until then, I’ve got shit
to do!
